devulgari (devulgari) wrote,
devulgari
devulgari

America Runs on Dunkin

I'm painting (staining, really, but it's opaque so it looks and feels like paint) the back porch and it's so hot right now that I wish I could fall into a swoon and be carried to a fainting couch to languish the rest of the afternoon away in peace. This is unlikely because 1.) the porch is in the back of the house 2.) No one ever comes down this one-way street anyway 3.) If I did faint the only people who would ever see me would be The Screamers, the children who live beyond the fence and scream their every piece of communication, ever, as far as we can tell and 4.) It's unlikely that anyone other than Paul Bunyan, the Brawny Man, or maybe My Dad could ever pick me up off the ground anyway. And I haven't a fainting couch here.

So I come inside for a bit of airconditioned refreshment and I'm drinking some iced chai that I made all by myself, when I spy a discarded Dunkin Donuts cup on my desk. And I start to wonder, are those jingles in the ads really They Might Be Giants? So I google it and They Are.

I'm not sure whether or not to be disturbed by this. On the one hand it means that when I'm bopping around work humming the "packing up a bunch of stuff to take to my uncle's beach house for a three day weekend, plenty of room! plenty of room! plenty of room!" I am in fact humming a song by one of my favorite bands ever. On the other than, One OF My Favorite Bands Ever has done a Dunkin Donuts ad. On the OTHER hand, I kinda like Dunkin Donuts anyway, so why not. It's not like TMBG did an ad for HealthSouth or something.

Here's the disturbing part. There's an ad about mowing the lawn when it's super hot outside. With an iced coffee. From Dunkin Donuts. So I spy the little icon-rific new logo for DD and I'm like huh, I think I will go do the grocery shopping now (because on a side note, there is seriously nothing to eat in this house-- I just ate the LAST BOCA BURGER on a STALE BUN, and my other choice was MINUTE RICE with KETCHUP, and it's not that I'm too poor to buy food, I just HATE THE GROCERY STORE) instead of later b/c then I can get an iced coffee on my way home and paint the porch when it's super hot outside.

Even tho I just drank a perfectly good iced tea that I made here in my home for a matter of cents.

I haven't decided whether or not I'm going to give in.
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